I know this is a book blog, but I recently bought O, the Oprah Magaizne and I read an article I’m very disappointed by. At the airport coming home from Disney, I decided to get a magazine to read on the way. One of the cover articles was entitled, “Inside a Marriage — Confessions of a Semi-Happy Wife.” It sounded intriguing. I thought it may give some good insights about how to be happier in a marriage during the difficult child-rearing years. Boy, was I wrong.
The actual title of the article in the magazine, written by Ellen Tien, was “Divorce Dreams.” The first half of the article was the author complaining about her husband. She goes on to say she would never disparage her marriage. What? Hasn’t she already done this by publicly complaining about her spouse? Then she describes her marriage as, “…Indiana, say, or Connecticut – some red areas, more blue. Less than bliss, better than disaster.” She claims to be everycouple.
The rest of the article describes how as Gen X women, we strive for more, as our mothers taught us. And, when we wonder how things “got to this” we always have divorce as an option. She feels that in the future, marriage will become obsolete .
Now, I understand and agree that “marriage takes work.” And, it’s not the happily ever after of fairy tales. But, I feel like this negativity about marriage presented by this author is part of her problem. And, could she really care too much about her husband if she’s willing to complain about him so publicly?
I may sound self-rightous and that’s not my intent. I understand complaining, to a few select friends so as not to embarrass my husband. I don’t think everyone who gets a divorce is shameful (my own parents are divorced). I just think that some people have too high of expectations that could never be met. And, to encourage others with this negativity is disappointing to me.